2/14/13—Making Your Move

Today's Draw: Two of Swords in the Crowning Influences position from the Mythic Tarot and the Deck of 1000 Spreads. Do you feel caught between a rock and a hard place? Do you know what you want, but seem to be paralyzed in moving toward it? How long do you think you can stand with one foot in your old life and one in your new?

Poor Orestes. Mom and Dad are having a fight and he's caught in the middle, refusing to pick a side. The Two of Swords speaks to a situation where you feel paralyzed. Maybe there's a reality you're refusing to face. Or stormy seas in your life you're choosing to ignore. Or a precarious balance or neutrality you're trying to hold. Whatever it is, there's usually some need to move forward, but a fear-based inability to do so. 

In the Crowing Influences position, it fits right into this week's theme of making changes and moving forward in our lives. The Crowing Influences position says that what's holding us back is the fact that we've got one foot in our old world and one foot in the new. 

Yesterday was all about making the decisions. And today is, too. This one foot in/one foot out thing is causing tension and anxiety within that is adding to our fear and uncertainty. In fact, a large portion of what we're experiencing as fear and anxiety may really just be the tension and anxiety of standing between two worlds. 

We can't stand like this forever. And no matter which direction we choose, it's scary. It's scary to stay the way we are. And it's scary to move into the unknown. But the difference between the two is that you know what the status quo holds. And you've chosen to step away from that toward an uncertain future that holds either something more beautiful or more horrific...haha. 

Are you trading your problems? Are you walking away too soon? Those are legitimate questions, but ones that also keep you stuck. 

Which possibility makes you feel larger? Which possibility calls out to you? Which possibility holds the most potential? Those are the questions to ask. 

I know a couple of people who are considering ending their marriages. One of the wisest things I've ever heard Dr. Phil say is that "you have to earn your way out of marriage." That means you can't leave before you know you've done everything you can to save it (unless you're being abused). And THAT means you have to do things like counseling and trying different ways to approach problems. You have to take responsibility for your 100% of the relationship and do what you can do to change the situation, even if your partner's 100% is not cooperating. I believe that a lot of marriages end prematurely. I look at people who have been together for 25 or 30 years and still love each other, and what I see is two people who stuck together through things that tore others apart. 

Marriages deserve that chance. Families deserve that chance. But when it comes to things like careers and where you live and the other details of life, you can spend a lifetime on the fence only to discover you've never lived. 

As many of you know, I had a brother who was seemingly healthy one day and less than six months later was dead of cancer. He died with two feet firmly planted in the midst of his family. He knew what he wanted and he went for it. You know what you want, too. So which foot will you move?

Alert! My sister, Janet, can stop reading at this point!!! ;)

Because I forgot to mention that the Mythic Tarot is the deck I learned on and it's a good deck for that. All the suits are wrapped up in a story from mythology and that makes it easy to learn the card meanings. See how the corner is ripped? This deck is like those old cotton sheets you have that look like crap, but feel good to the touch.

Also tarot nerds might be interested in the whole week I devoted to the Two of Swords, using a different interpretation every day for the Two of Swords from the Victorian Romantic. Students might also be interested, because I give insight into the different ways I look at the cards. View that week here http://thedailytarotdraw.blogspot.com/2012_09_09_archive.html

9/14/12—Choosing the Consequence

Today's Draw: Two of Swords from the Victorian Romantic Tarot. Do you tend to hold emotions and frustrations inside until you ultimately burst? Or do you find that you dispense your emotions as they come? What is your emotional style?

So it's the final day of the One Card Challenge. Today's interpretation comes from something I saw in the card as I looked at it again this morning. 

She's got stormy skies, rough water and dangerous rocks behind her. So we can interpret that as meaning that the worst is behind her. But we could also see it the opposite way. To me, she looks like she's about to fall backward, like in one of trust tests they do at corporate retreats...you know, where you fall back into the waiting arms of others? 

I have a love/hate relationship with my emotions. Sometimes it feels good to just feel and let your emotions out. Other times, it can be scary. Emotions can be a gateway to depression and wallowing for me. Ain't pretty, but it's true. 

To me, this card seems to be saying "I've tried everything to release this pain short of letting it wash over me. So I'm just going to fall into it and trust I won't drown." That's what all the experts say to do, right? Feel what you feel. Let it all out. Feel it until you heal it.

I used to be really good at crying and "feeling it". But somewhere along the line, all of that went away. I don't know if it's age or negative reinforcement or numbness or what. I can't do it anymore. Which isn't to say I don't still cry from time to time. But now I cry when the rain barrel is full and can't hold any more emotion. Or when really bad stuff happens, like when my brother was dying. 

Honestly, I spent so many years being either content and "normal" or down and depressed (I've never been manic, which is evident by how little ever gets done around this house) that I don't even know what's healthy or "normal" anymore. Is it healthy to just let emotions wash over you? Or is it healthy to just take them by the jugful when you've got the capacity? With my history of depression, falling back into the waters frightens me. 

The good news is that somewhere between making better choices, building self esteem, meditating, gaining a spiritual purpose and starting on prescribed pharmaceuticals, I feel pretty even most of the time these days. A couple of years ago menopausal mood swings made antidepressants wise, if not necessary, for me. But all those years of resisting them makes my knee-jerk reactions err on the side of not swimming in the deep end if I can help it. 

Pretty much every entry I write comes with an answer. But this one does not. Will this woman have the courage to fall backward? And if she does fall in back in trust, will she get taken by a rip tide? Or will she wash gently back up on shore, weary from the waves, but nonetheless cleansed? I really don't know. 

That's part of the dilemma of the Two of Swords. A choice has to be made and every choice we make in life comes with some sort of gift and some sort of consequence. We usually choose based on the gifts. But we do have to be cognizant that we're also choosing a consequence. 

Perhaps that's what she's really falling back into in this card...a choice. And she just has to trust that whatever consequence she's choosing is one she can live with. 

9/13/12—Finding Truth in the Gray Areas

Today's Draw: Two of Swords from the Victorian Romantic. Do you believe one presidential candidate is whacked out and the other is reasonable? Do you find yourself using the word "evil" to describe people in your life? What can BJ and Fifty Shades of Gray tell you about how to be in this world?

Day Four of the One Card Challenge and I'm rarin' to go! Since part of my intent for this week was to teach a little about different ways you can read cards, I'm going to do some teachy teachy stuff today, too. 

One of the ways I teach card meanings is to teach all the twos at once, for example. It actually works. There are common lines you can draw and keywords you can reference through each number of the minor arcana which can make remembering card meanings a little easier. And each number 1-10 of the minor arcana (the "pips" as we call them in tarot) corresponds to two, sometimes three major arcana cards. These cards also embody the same basic keywords. 

The majors that correspond to the number 2 are the High Priestess (major arcana 2), Justice (major arcana 11) and Judgment (major arcana 20). The reason these are all twos is because if you reduce their numerical assignations to a single digit, you get two. For example, Justice is card 11 and 1+1=2. 

So yesterday we talked about balance and choice being keywords for the twos. That is clearly seen in the Justice card with the scales of justice and fair reasoning. And it can be seen in Judgment, because the angel is calling your soul to judgment so a choice can be made based on your past experiences. Those are simplistic definitions of those cards, but they work. 

But now to the mother of all twos, the High Priestess. For me, she demonstrates another aspect of the twos...dualism. She is positioned between the dark and light pillars of Solomon's temple, Boaz and Jachin (bet you thought the BJ stood for something else, huh?). All this points to balance. And the High Priestess is the embodiment of the intuitive powers we discussed in yesterday's card. But, to me it also says she stands in that place between black and white. Which is the meaning I want to address in today's entry. 

In both of the Two of Swords cards you've seen, the woman's head is centered between two equal and opposing things...the hands on the Victorian Romantic version and the Swords on the Rider Waite Smith. Somewhere in that intersection between the two extremes is where truth lies. All three of the major arcana cards I've discussed today are focused around truth in different ways...the practical facts of Justice, the spiritual truths of judgement and the intuitive truths of the High Priestess. What all these cards are telling us is that truth lies within shades of gray (cue the jokes about 50 Shades of Gray). 

You see it all the time. Someone is surly and antisocial. So they're a monster, a psychopath, evil incarnate. Or a restaurant has really good pasta, so you've got to go there, everything on the menu is fabulous! We tend to place judgments on people, situations and things based on black and white views of the world. The truth is rarely black or white. The surly person might give of themselves in other ways. And the restaurant might have a really bad cheesesteak. I would like to say "nothing is all good or all bad", but even that statement is an absolute! 

Though I sometimes find myself placing people at things at extremes, it's a bit of a pet peeve of mine. I really don't like the way we demonize some people and deify others. We not only do them a disservice, but we do ourselves one, too. Because we never see the truth. More importantly, though, we put greater distance between ourselves and our god.

A couple of days ago the US commemorated the day when "the evil doers came and attacked our innocent country." That is how many Americans feel. But the thing is, every interaction and every drama we have with someone else reflects something back on us. And when we demonize our opposition and deify ourselves, we hold that reflection away from us, as though it has nothing to do with us. 

Denied in all the violence of that day was a message about the way we're seen in the world. Certainly it was an extreme message and an extreme expression. And I, in no way, excuse what they did or accuse the victims. This isn't about that. It's about how, when we demonize others, we miss the reflection. We say, "that is not me, I am good, they are bad, I am reasonable, they're fanatics." 

The truth is America's not all good. Some of the things the terrorists had to say about our ego focused, money driven society were true. A few blocks away and a few years later, another unfriendly plot was being hatched against our citizens by Wall Street. We may have been taken by surprise by the crash of our economy, but do you think the jihadists were? Of course not. They've been trying to tell us who we are for years. But we didn't listen. Because they're crazy evil doers and we're doers of good. Just ask all the families we've given mosquito nets to in third world countries.

When we say, "all those criticisms are outside of me, they have nothing to do with me, I have no control over their opinions"—when we refuse to listen and see what's being reflected back—we keep the door open for more aggression to happen. When we demonize our detractors, we, in that one simple act, absolve ourselves of responsibility in the dynamic. If god is everywhere and everything, we can't disconnect from others by placing them separate from us. They're not. We are all part of, and a product of, god. We are all of the same stuff, just in slightly different shades of gray with no pure black or white among us.

I don't mean this to be about 9/11 or good and evil, but more to illustrate what we do when we ignore shades of gray. Those men who flew into the towers had families that they loved. They were doing this as part of a holy war in their minds. They were doing this out of devotion to their beliefs.We can debate all day about how screwed up that is, just as we can debate how screwed up America was to enslave men and women based on our beliefs. The fact remains, they were not all bad. And we're not all good. Black and white are only reference points to enable all the gray in between. 

So, in all my story above, we see how the Two of Swords can indicate a mind split into dualistic thinking and show us that our head should rest somewhere in the area between. We can see how the truth lies between those extremes and the role intuition and divine fairness play throughout the twos. And we can also see how black and white thinking is another way of holding others and our god at arm's length. If we're going to evolve and if we're ever going to change the way this crappy world operates, we need to ditch the dualistic thinking that holds our growth at bay and begin to understand ourselves and others in a more divinely intimate way. 

9/12/12—Seeing Within

Today's Draw: Two of Swords from the Victorian Romantic Tarot. Are you on the fence about a decision? Is your indecision driving you batty all throughout the noggin? Is it possible that there's something in the big picture you're failing to see?

For today's look at the Two of Swords, I'm going to use the traditional meaning for the card. Or perhaps I should say one of the traditional meanings for the card. Which means I'm also going to include the traditional image so you can see what I'm talking about. 

Quite different from the one we've looked at the last couple of days, huh? She's blindfolded. And while you would think that would make her more vulnerable, she doesn't seem nearly as vulnerable as she does in the Victorian Romantic's version. For one thing, she's sitting, so she's quite stable. For another, the turbulent skies behind her are gone. And, let's get down to brass tacks. The real reason she looks less vulnerable is because that chick is totally armed to the hilt with those ten-foot-long mammajammas she's holding! :D

Twos in tarot are all about balance and choice. So whatever suit you're in, the twos bring a second thing into the picture that brings balance and a choice. In the cups, it's about meeting your "other half" and choosing love. In pentacles, it's about choosing to balance resources. In wands, it's weighing your options so you can make a balanced decision. And in the swords, it signals two thoughts or ideas, each of which have equal, and sometimes opposing, appeal. 

This is our REAL image of the week.

Somewhere inside you, there's a tie that needs to be broken...a split decision that needs to be resolved. Some consider the blindfold to indicate something you're not seeing. Some consider it an aid in objectivity. Either way, my thought about this version of the card is that all your focus and energy is going into the debate in your head. But there is another factor plastered all over the card that you may be missing—your intuition, represented by both the moon and water. Perhaps that's why she wears the blindfold. To see within. 

Swords is one of the most difficult suits of the tarot because it deals with all that noise inside our heads. Sometimes we get so caught up in strategy and thought and fairness and weighing things that we forget to consult our inner muse. Where does your intuition want you to go? Where are the tides you pulling you personally? Forget about what you *think*. What do you KNOW?

The Two of Swords comes along to reassure us that we have what we need to make the right decision. We just need to make it. But it also tells us that, try as we might to make a decision where everyone wins, swords cut both ways. So if you're holding out for a decision without consequences, you'll be suffering at the edge of life's vast saltwater pond for quite some time. Capice?

9/11/12—Assessing Our Boundaries

Today's Draw: Two of Swords from the Victorian Romantic Tarot. Do you know someone who puts up so many boundaries you just can't connect with them on a deeper level? Is it possible you have a boundary or two that really doesn't serve you? Or, conversely, is it possible your boundaries aren't strong enough?

It's day two of One Card Challenge week and I'm going to go with my favorite meaning of this particular Two of Swords, holding back the world. That's the meaning that comes with the guidebook to this deck, yet it's still not the traditional meaning of the card. To me "holding back the world" connotes two things, both having to do with boundaries. One is a sort of "stop the world, I want to get off" kind of thing where you just can't take any more stimuli and you have to shut doors for a short time. The other is a permanent wall you erect to draw boundaries of protection. 

The good side of boundaries is that they show lines that others can't cross. These are the lines that keep users, abusers, haters, energy vampires and other na'er-do-wells at bay. Being lax on your boundaries with people that don't match your vibe just invites them in. Every time you say "don't do xyz" and then proceed to allow the other party to do xyz without consequence, you not only lose respect and your integrity, buy you also push your boundaries out further and further, enabling more and more "abuse". So when it comes to deal breakers in relationships, it's good to have strong boundaries and follow through on them.

The downside of boundaries is that you can have ones so firm that they push everyone away. I used to have a friend who never turned on her phone and was only available by email during work hours. If you had an issue and needed to talk, it would only happen after she retrieved her phone messages, and then when she felt like returning the call. Essentially you had to make an appointment at least 24 hours in advance to access her friendship. This was not the person to call if you were ever in jail, bleeding or in need of shoulder to cry on. She was only available for good times, and on her terms. 

So people can draw boundaries so tight that their interactions with others can't make it past the superficial. But not all unhealthy boundaries are so obvious. We often disguise them. For example, there's the person who gets sexually intimate early in a relationship because it keeps the risk of emotional intimacy at bay. Or the person who over-shares so you'd never suspect their REAL issue. What looks like loose boundaries might actually be there to hold you back from discovering the real secrets. 

Usually the last thing we consider when we have unsatisfactory relationships is that we might actually be part of the problem. The last thing we ask is how our own boundaries might be contributing to the repeating cycles in our lives. Sometimes we catch a glimpse of those boundaries and decide they're ok. After all, we're all allowed to draw lines in the sand. But when we're not happy with the quality of our relationships, we owe it to ourselves to ask "where might my boundaries—or laxity with my boundaries—be to blame?"

There are many ways that we try to "hold back the world". The Two of Swords acknowledges that there are circumstances under which we need to temporarily erect physical, spiritual, social or psychological defenses. But when those defenses become part of our day to day routine, it's time to assess whether they're doing more harm than good.  

9/10/12—Surrendering to Something Higher

Today's Draw: Two of Swords from the Victorian Romantic tarot. Is there a struggle in your life you're willing to give up in order to reach a higher state of being? Is there a way in which you've placed conditions on your own self love? What are you willing to do to put these issues behind you?

First, I'd like to invite any of you on Facebook to please "like" my new author page, K. Tierney Sadler, Author. This is where I'll be posting updates about my books, including The Deck of 1000 Spreads due out in Spring 2013 from Llewellyn and now available for pre-order. My apologies to those of you who are among my Facebook friends, because you've now heard this a few times. :)

OK. On to the business at hand. This week is One Card Challenge week at the Daily Draw. And by that I mean I'm going to choose one card and do the entire week on that one card, posting a different message every day. I'm doing this for a few reasons. One is to show my students (and anyone else) how this can be done. Another is to challenge myself, because I'm not sure I can do it. And a third reason is because I often do a couple of days with a single card and I thought it would be interesting to see what I might get revisiting a card for an entire week. 

So the deck I've chosen this week is the Victorian Romantic. I chose this deck because it's one of my three main reading decks. That doesn't make this task easier, imo. It makes it harder, because I already have automatic ways I read the cards in this deck. 

I always say to my students, "Forget about the card's meaning. What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you turn the card over?" With this Two of Swords, on this particular day, my response is "devotion". Devotion in the sense that the woman seems transfixed, blind to what is going on around her and intoxicated by whatever is happening before her. This is not the traditional meaning of this card, nor what the author intended. I will be addressing those aspects later in the week. "Devotion" is just my first impression of the card upon seeing it. 

Devotion to something is surrendering to it. There is no resistance. Nothing to question. No conditions. Surrender is the same as the unconditional love I spoke of last week. In this particular card, I see surrender to either a higher power or surrender to some aspect of life. In those cases, surrender brings the added gift of freedom from a lot of emotional pain. 

So, lets go back to the fictional example of the mother of the Colorado shooter (seeing as how I have no knowledge of his real mother). But assuming she has total unconditional love for this child, she is likely not in pain because he hurt HER by killing people. She forgave him for everything he may ever do when he was still in her womb. That's how unconditional love works. You love without condition. You forgive without condition. Which is not to say she's not in pain, but her pain is likely for how he has hurt himself, how he has hurt others in the family and how he has hurt all the people touched by the tragedy. 

What she is not suffering over is this—Can I ever forgive him? How can I continue to love a son like that? Of course my example is that of an imagined ideal, but really consider where much of your pain would be as a mother were there even a question about conditions. It would be in "can I turn away from him when he needs me because what he has done is so horrific?" When you've surrendered, the answer is no. It's not even a question. And if you can forgive the big stuff, you're wasting energy bothering over the small stuff. So you gotta forgive that, too. The same is true when you're devoted to God, yourself, a pet...anyone. 

So as not to sound like a re-hash of last Friday's post about the healing power of unconditional love, I do specifically want to make the point about God and yourself in today's entry. If you feel resentment toward God for something, your love is not unconditional. If you blame him for your pain, your love is not unconditional. And you do need to take responsibility if you ever thought it was. Because if it was, your love and confidence in him would have never come into question. 

Next, the point about YOU.  Ask yourself if and why you've ever turned away from yourself. Are you engaged in an addiction or dangerous or self-destructive behavior? That's turning away from yourself. Are you beating yourself up for your infractions? Are you mistreating yourself? I'm among those who will admit to not being devoted to myself, not surrendering to myself and not loving myself unconditionally. And I have no good reason to give as to why. 

I have no good reason why I allow myself to suffer over myself, except that I must feel a need to suffer for some imagined infraction. Because frankly, I've never done anything worthy of treating myself the way I treat myself, nor would I allow anyone else in my life to cause me the pain I've caused myself. It has long been time to love myself for who I am, starting with the way I am now. 

So if you find yourself in a cycle of pain with yourself, with God or with another, it's because you haven't *decided* to love them unconditionally. Because if you had made that decision, no condition could have come along to change your mind. You don't have to love everyone unconditionally. But if you have a child, pet, god or self that you continue cycling in pain around, you may want to make that decision. It doesn't come automatically just through your relation to that person. It's a decision you have to make and never go back on. A decision to forgive and love, no matter what. A decision to put that love above the ego...above the need to be right. A decision to surrender to what is and what may come. Then acting in integrity to that. It's a verb that never stops verbing in your life. 

Easy? No. But it gets easier once you get past the struggle to surrender...once you start making choices in alignment with love. The woman in this card can be seen putting the emotions (water), mental struggles (clouds), worldly concerns (earth/rock) and impulse (lightning) behind her, and surrendering her focus to a higher state of being. So what struggle are you willing to give up in your life for that higher state of being? And what choices are you willing to make to get yourself there?

6/5/12—Thinking a New Thought

Today's Draw: Two of Swords from Tarot of the Crone by Ellen Lorenzi-Prince. What thoughts are swirling around in your head right now? Are they productive and supportive? And if not, what other thoughts could you be thinking instead?

I'm really digging the description of this card from the book. She says that, while the Ace of Swords represents a state of being conscious, the Two of Swords is about the self-conscious. It's about the mind thinking about its own thoughts. 

I had never thought of it that way before...the mind thinking about its own thoughts. 

Anyway, reflecting on what the mind is thinking is what this card is about today. It indicates a time to rethink, analyze and confirm your thinking. Many times we don't even pay attention to our own thoughts as they barrel through our heads. 

Our own self reflection, or even reflection on other things, holds the purpose of deepening our understanding. This card suggests that changing the thought to something different can actually help us deepen our understanding more. So become aware of what you're thinking and consider how you can think something different.

For a good portion of my career it used to really rub up against my ego when clients would send something back because they didn't like the direction I had gone in. It's not something that happens terribly often, but it's inevitable in a creative career. You just can't please all the people all the time. While the first solution you presented may have worked well strategically and creatively, it didn't resonate with the client the same way. Or maybe, without knowing it, you inadvertently stumbled across some idea that's a no-no in their industry. There are many reasons why this would happen, most of which are not "we're sending it back because you suck."

Anyway, in my early years, I'd spend a lot of mental energy around "what I gave them before was brilliant and they just can't appreciate the wisdom of my genius!" Haha. But then I'd go back to the drawing board. Because I had to. And, without fail, the solution I would come up with in the second round would be, admittedly, a better answer than the original one. There was wisdom in their sending the idea back. So, I get it now. Most of the time I'll hit the nail on the head the first time. But when I don't, it gives me an opportunity to deepen my understanding of the client's business and needs. Either way, it's a good thing. 

In that case, thinking a new thought is probably why I'm still successful doing what I do today. The old thought is why people quit this business and move on. The old thought is what burns you out after 15 years. The old thought is what makes you bitter. And the new thought really made me better at what I do...it provided a deeper understand of the value of rejected ideas.

Another aspect of "thinking a new thought" draws upon on the subject of manifestation from yesterday. Our thoughts shape our reality...or as Mike Dooley says, "thoughts become things". If you really listened to your thoughts, you'd probably be surprised at how often you think self-defeating thoughts..."I suck at this", "I'll never lose weight" or "nobody loves me" are just a few examples. We do this, then wonder why we never get better at such and such, why we never lose weight and why nobody ever loves us!

Our thoughts become our reality. So thinking about the thoughts we think is an important part of creating change in our lives. Until we change our thoughts, we can't manifest what we want outside of our heads. 

So what have you been thinking? And what else could you be thinking? It's worth a thought.

1/7/12-1/8/12—Asking Why

Weekend Reading: Two of Swords from the Alchemical Renewed by Robert Place. This card is about actively questioning and seeking wisdom. It's about not taking things at face value. It's about finding out for yourself. So this weekend, ask questions. Maybe you need to have an internal debate about why you want such-and-such thing. Maybe you're questioning why your kid needs to borrow $50. Or maybe you're asking if something you've being doing for 40 years is truly genuine to you. Whether you're buying $5 cups of coffee or spending 15 minutes every morning warming up your car, ask yourself why. And keep asking why until you get to a REAL answer. We do too many things on a daily basis just because it's the way we've always done it. Or because everyone else does it that way. But if you want to start living more consciously and nourishing yourself more effectively, it's time to start asking some questions.

1/3/12—Getting Over Your Bad-Ass Superior Self

Today's Draw: The Two of Swords from the Housewives Tarot. Can you fairly and impartially say that your God is better than my God...or anyone else's God? Do you think that some people come here to be on a spiritual path and others come here to be monsters? Are you ready to really question your integrity when it comes to your beliefs?

The Two of Swords is about being fair and impartial in your assessment of things. All the posts I make are about self development and spirituality, but yesterday's post inspired me to try to equate this week's posts to big lessons we need to learn on the spiritual path. So that's what I'm going to do, assuming the cards cooperate. And today they certainly did. (Meanwhile, I just love the Housewives Tarot...it's so kitschy. So if you're on my blog, you'll get to see a few extra pictures from it.)

Being fair and balanced is, I think, one of the hardest things people learn on their spiritual path. And there are two contexts I'll use to illustrate why. Of course this depends on peoples' beliefs, but I'd venture to say most people reading this will agree:

1. We are all here for a reason and we walk different paths based on that reason... and we all come here with struggles to overcome and pains to heal. 
2. There is a higher power that is good and is the one true higher power.  

Now, while most people can agree on those points, many of us struggle to find our balance, fairness and impartiality on those points. Here's what I mean. (And, by the way, if you don't agree with those points, read on. Because the same principles apply to you, too.)

Let's pretend you have a "mean" and "immature" boss. Well if you believe we're all here for a reason, that boss is on a path just like you are, and they're just in a different place along that path. They may be ahead of you in, say, manifesting success and behind you in treating everyone like a beloved lamb of God, for example. So let's say they make you take the blame for something they did at work. In that moment (and all moments afterward, probably) you might have a tendency to dehumanize them. They are no longer on a path and struggling just like you. They are a monster, demented, abusive and something must be done about them. Bad monster! MEAN monster!!!! SICK MONSTER!!!!

OK, that example is a little dramatic, but admit it. You do that. You've done that. We all have.

Being fair and balanced in our beliefs requires us to move past that kind of "us and them" thinking. Having integrity in the belief that all humans are here on a spiritual path that is uniquely their own and not for us to judge, means allowing the "monster" their imperfection. When you see the boss as someone who is so pained by insecurity that they can't take responsibility for their actions, well gosh, haven't we all been there at some point in our lives? 

Being fair means realizing that they struggle just like we do. It means looking into that person's eyes and seeing yourself, even if their lessons are not yours to learn in this lifetime and even if they're way behind schedule learning it and even if they hurt you in the process. Because, let's face it, we all have something crappy to deal with on our plate that someone else skates effortlessly past. For me, one of those things is my struggle with my weight. Something so easy for many of you—moderate diet and exercise—is something I feel powerless against and overwhelmed by. 

Being fair and balanced is allowing everyone else their own crap, even if they are a serial killer. Yes. Even if they're a serial killer. It doesn't mean you have to be their friend. Doesn't mean you have to approve of their behavior. And it doesn't mean their actions don't hurt or piss you off. It just means that if you believe we're all here for a reason and can't judge another's path, then you can't judge their path and label them a monster. You can't continue to see them as something separate from you. Because they're not. They ARE you. They're a spirit struggling in their human skin, just as you are. They're simply learning different lessons and having different difficulties than you in this lifetime. And thank God their issues aren't your cross to bear this time around. But you know what? If you believe in reincarnation, you will, in one lifetime or another, do something so heinous that you will be reviled, too. We all have it in us. Thank god only a few of us have to go there this time around.

Allowing others their stuff is a hard one and probably one we'll always have to work on. So is the next one...the one about God is good and there is only one God. Yes, I have a vision of "God" and, as I said yesterday, I call it the Universe. It's not a being, but an energy. It is a good energy. It is the bestest, juiciest energy ever. To hear me talk about it, you'd think I was talking about Joel Osteen's God. I am. And I'm not. 

Years back I had a terrible dislike of anything Christian. I saw Christians, in general, as misguided hypocrites who talk about Christ like he's his Father (I still don't understand that one) and preach about forgiveness and non-judgment in the same breath as they tell you you're going to burn in hell for being a non-believer. Certainly that was my experience, as seen through my lens at the time.

Meanwhile, I would talk about MY god and how MY god was the SAME god as their god, but MY god was nicer and wouldn't burn anyone in hell. And I'd wonder, "why can't those hypocrites see that my god and their god are the same god, but we just see him through different eyes?"

I should have been asking that question of myself, right? Because if I was fair and balanced in my assessment that there is only one god—a god adept enough to show itself to us in different flavors to accommodate the free will we have here on earth—then I would love their god, too. Because there is no "my" god and "their" god. There is only one god. And instead of looking for the hypocrisy within their beliefs, I'd look in their eyes and see that the love and reverence and hope they had Him all wrapped up in was the exact same as mine. If I were truly fair and balanced and impartial and walking in integrity with my belief, I would allow them their god and their beliefs and their struggles on their paths with their beliefs, rather than see them as something outside of me, different than me, less than me.

It doesn't mean I don't still see hypocrisies and inconsistencies in the beliefs of others, just as my earlier point doesn't mean I don't see when people are acting unkindly or unfairly. What it means is that I'm honest enough to see the hypocrisies and inconsistencies in my own beliefs and behaviors—no belief system is bullet proof. And I'm fair enough in my assessment of others to see that they're struggling and in pain just like me. Just with different stuff.

And here's the thing, I didn't have to compromise anything of what I believe in order to be more inclusive. In fact, I merely had to act in integrity with my beliefs. If there is one true God, as most religions teach, then we all believe in the same one. Even if we call it/him/her/them by different names. And (and I know this is my personal belief and not necessarily the belief of others) the dude is SO cool that he doesn't care about ego issues like what to call him and how to draw a picture of him. He just wants us to know him, in whatever way we're capable. It's not about changing beliefs at all, imo. It's just a way of seeing things that's more inclusive...more Christ-like, frankly.

So those are the two examples I can think of on the spiritual path where people think they're being fair and impartial and good and right and are totally missing the mark. We're quick to recognize it when it's "them" that's doing it, but not so quick when it's us. And you may not believe as I do, but I'll bet you can apply this to your beliefs, as well.

Again on the 2012 thing, there's a whole group of people out there who believe we need to reach a certain tipping point on this inclusiveness thing in order for society to survive. The philosophy is known as Oneness...the idea that we are all one. They believe this year is critical to that, as though we are at a crossroads. One path leads us further into the dark and the other—the path of inclusiveness and oneness—leads us toward the light. 

Personally I don't buy that it has to happen this year or whatever. And there are those who think the Oneness people are a cult...haha. But honestly, what could it hurt to see the person standing next to you through balanced and impartial eyes? What damage does it do to see others with no other agenda than love in our hearts? How can it do anything but further us on our spiritual paths? Call it Oneness or Christ Consciousness or just being a good person. Call it what you will, but so many of us ask why we can't all do that and be that way, then we sit down in front of the TV and look at Lindsy Lohan and shake our heads in disapproval. That's not walking the talk, people. We've all done it and do it, but it's time to heal that part of us, whether our neighbor or the rest of society joins in or not. Ghandi says "be the change you want to see in the world". It ain't gonna happen any other way, folks. Are you up to the task?