Wednesday, September 5, 2012

9/6/12—Healing the Self

Today's Draw: The Star from the Healing Earth Tarot. Where are you on the path toward self-acceptance? How about self love? What is your inner self reflecting to the outside world about who you are?

Today's card comes subtitled "Healing the Self". So I can't think of a more appropriate card for day four of Healing Thoughts and Practices week. In the book there's all this crap about the card depicting healing waters flowing in and out of the goddess' vagina. *barf* *I mean, really, baarrrrff*

The nice little nugget from the book, though, is that the self is made up of many different inner worlds, each reflecting a different part of us to the outside world. And when we heal one of these inner worlds, we heal that part of our outer world it reflects upon as well. The book goes on to say, "to heal a part of our being means to totally accept or love that part, to bring it back home. Making an enemy on the inside quickly produces an enemy on the outside."

So the Star asks you to look at whatever is inside you that you do not like, to see why it's there and to begin to "relax the tension created by holding it separate". Likewise, I think you can look outside of you and see what you don't like, see what it reflects from within and stop holding that separate from you, too. 

All of this is very relevant and timely for me. I recently had an opportunity to see something from a completely divergent perspective. And in the course of that, I was able to note how I might have handled the same situation 10 years ago or 20 years ago and how much I had changed. How much I had healed. And how much I've incorporated things I may have once felt separate from and brought them home to a place of self acceptance. 

One of my healing sessions I attend each month sometimes asks me to "breathe in divine self acceptance" or "divine self love". I often have trouble with those two things. I'm very hard on myself. I sell myself short. I think most people who know me well would agree about that and have often said as much to me. So sitting well with who I am is difficult. Not that I think I'm a monster, but just that, inevitably, some criticism pops to the fore and stands in the way of me bringing self love and self acceptance home. 

There are times, however, when someone who has a much more dismal view of me than I have of myself comes forward. I know in the past I've always worked hard to defend myself against each and every item on their lists. But now I don't. Something has shifted in me that now allows them their dismal view without trying to convince them otherwise...or allowing it to diminish how I feel about myself. That's huge for me. 

When you're "at home" with your flaws, there's no point left to argue. When someone says things that are untrue, you can readily recognize them as such. It's the things that sting or hurt that you might want to consider before brushing aside. The Star in this deck brings the opportunity to do all three, all in the hopes of making you whole and bringing you home.


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