10/18/12—Contemplating the Hard Questions

Today's Draw: Four of Cups from the Victorian Romantic (Second Edition). How long has it been since you've taken stock of how much you've changed over the past few years? Does it feel like something is missing in your life? What would it *really* take for you to be happy?

The Four of Cups is about boredom or a lull in your life. But the Victorian Romantic brings a nuance to  the card's traditional meaning that really rings true. See, the guy is at a party, he's got beautiful women hanging off him and, yet, he's feeling dead inside. 

It's about having everything you want and still not being happy. That could happen because of depression or because you're someone who likes the process of creating something in your life, but feel restless when the work is done. It could be for a lot of reasons. But more often than not, I'll bet, it's because the things you want aren't the things that make you happy. Or things that once made you happy no longer do so. 

I think we all feel that way now and again. Yesterday we talked a bit about looking back over our year. But in a way, today's card is asking us to take stock of who we are overall. This is no easy task, because it means answering questions like:

• How have your values changed in the past five years or so and what in your life has not changed in kind?
• What do you believe about who you are and what you deserve, how has that changed and do you act in alignment with those changes?
• What practices or actions no longer feel genuine or comfortable in your life?
• What drains your energy and what fuels it?
• Do you ever find yourself doing something you used to not question, and now you wonder why you're doing it?
• Are there behaviors or actions or attitudes you're ashamed of...or feel it's time to let go of?
• What is missing in your life?

These are just a few of the kinds of questions that are good to take time to ruminate on. You all know someone who hasn't changed their hair style in 20 years. I know this because I'm that person...haha. And we tend to do with our lives what some of us do with our hair...we tend to pick a course of action and stay on it until the bitter end. 

We rarely take the time to proactively examine who we are, who we want to be and what to clear out of our life to get it. It's like spring cleaning. But instead, we allow cobwebs and clutter to accumulate within our spirit and end up like the guy who has everything but contentment. So if you're kind of feeling that way, as I am, maybe take a look at who you are today and start living for that person instead.