Thursday, August 16, 2012

8/17/12—Stopping Your World

Today's Draw: Healing (Temperance) from the Threefold Oracle by Tara Cochrane. What do you do each month that is ONLY for you? Do you have a regular healing ritual you do for yourself? Or do you find that there just never seems to be time for stuff like that in your busy life?

First a word about this oracle because it's unique. What Tara Cochrane has done here is interpret the major arcana three different ways for a total of 66 cards. She's used three different mediums: mixed media with watercolor, block printing with watercolor, and pen and watercolor, which is what this card is. But it's not just the mediums that are different. It's also the imagery, her interpretations and the card names. The lwb is a pdf you can request for free from the artist or you can buy in print form. 

That said, the final day Self Care Week is pretty logical. Do something *special* to support your emotional, physical, spiritual healing on a regular basis. Make it an event. One that happens at least once a month. That can be a massage, a healing session, a meditation class, *gentle* yoga, a spa day, sitting silently in a church....whatever. This isn't about going to the mall and, while you're there, buying something for your daughter. It's also not about meeting the girls for drinks and listening to all their problems. This all about you. 

Take time off of work to do it, if you can. And if you can't do that, then let your spouse order Chinese while you're treating yourself. I say this because it makes it more special, imo. It's the difference between finding time in your busy schedule of caring for others and making your schedule of caring for others accommodate you, you know? A final tip—make it an *appointment* that is *non-negotiable*. Like the dentist. Or a mammogram. 

I take the first (sometimes second) Tuesday of every month off. I go to a healing session in the morning, then on the way home, I stop and take myself out for a nice lunch along the river. I buy myself Godivas and maybe even a trinket, if I'm in the mood. The entire day is mine. It happens while everyone else is working. That makes it more sweet. And it's always scheduled a month ahead of time, so I can work around it. I also leave work two hours early one or two Fridays a month, also for healing sessions. Call it a mental health day. 

In the past I also used to have something called Night of Beauty. I did it every Sunday. It would start around 7pm with a candlelit bath and deep conditioning. Then it would lead to chocolate and journaling. I probably kept this appointment with myself regularly for five or six years. It was non-negotiable. All my friends knew better than to try to get me on a Sunday. I also had a couple of years of twice-monthly massages. See how it works?

This is time that is ALL about you. Nobody else. And it's not second or third or when-you-can-get-to-it priority, it's first priority. Once you "make the date" you'll see. Life flows around it. It's not as big a deal as you think it is. And if anyone tries to make you feel guilty about it, don't buckle to their manipulation. 

Clearly it's not an issue for me anymore, but I know there are some of you out there full of reasons why you can't spare the time. I used to have those reasons myself...I've got to be there for my clients when they need me, it's not fair to leave the dogs all day when they're used to having me around, there's so much other stuff I could be doing with that time, it's selfish, blah, blah, blah. 

Trust me Atlas, the world won't stop spinning if you take a couple of hours a month for yourself. Your kids/spouse/boss/parakeet will adjust. And instead of modeling self-sacrifice for them, you'll be modeling self care. The harder it is to break away for something like this, the more you need it. It's time for other things to wait. Your self kindness and care have been waiting long enough. 

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