6/19/13—Learning Lessons the Hard Way

ATTN: Tomorrow's Daily Draw will be one of those "special" posts I do for the blog group I'm a member of. So those of you accustomed to reading tomorrow's post the night before, I will be posting Friday's post at 1am Eastern on Friday (rather than at 8pm on Thursday)

Today's Draw Classic*: Three of Swords in the Lesson position from the Legacy of the Divine by Ciro Marchetti and the Deck of 1000 Spreads by me. When you think on the big lessons in your life, do you remember more of the ones you learned through pain more profoundly? Or do you remember more of the lessons you learned through happy moments more profoundly? Is there something you can learn from that?

It's interesting that this combo came up, because I've been thinking lately about the lessons we learn from heartbreak. If you can't tell by the tarot card (and the spectacular way my spread card makes the fractured heart on the cheek pop) that's what this card is about. 

I often debate the value of the lessons we learn from loss vs. the value of the lessons we learn through victory. I will never misspell the word "committee" ever again because it caused me to lose a spelling bee in third grade. I cried just like the girl in the picture there. 

Looking back over my life, the most valuable lessons I've learned have been the tough ones. That doesn't mean we don't learn from the good stuff because we do. Doing something right the first time reinforces that behavior or system and so you repeat it to success time and time again. But when that's the case, it just becomes the way you do it....a repeatable process that ends in success. Not so much a lesson you've learned, but something you figured out on your own. 

But when you learn something the hard way, it becomes somehow more meaningful, more profound. We define it more like a lesson than just a "way". It seems like the higher the price, the more meaningful the lesson, the less likely we are to screw with that particular thing again. Some lessons we just have to learn that way, whether through our own obstinance, lack of awareness or whatever. 

Can you think of a lesson you learned in the past that you didn't need to learn? Can you think of a painful experience you've ever had that didn't bring lessons? I can't. Pain seems to write on us in ways that both knock us to our knees in tears and then, after time, to our knees in gratitude. It is both toxin and tonic. It poisons and purifies. 

The universe never brings us something in error. If we're experiencing pain, it's needed on our path. If we're on a winning streak, it's needed on our path. Everything is brought to us in love, as a means to lift us higher. That's sometimes hard to see in the moment, but always visible in retrospect. The hardest lesson of all—the one that causes the most self-inflicted pain—is to learn is to trust in that. 

*From 3/22/13

6/19/13—Watching Our Ships Come In

Today's Draw: The Three of Wands from Marcia McCord's Postcard Tarot in the House of the Letter from my Deck of Lenormand Houses. What is happening on the horizon in your life right now? Are the fruits of your labors now in sight? Are you planning on celebrating no matter what happens? 

Today I'm mixing tarot with Lenormand. Because I'm a troublemaker. The interesting thing about this particular combo is that Marcia's Three of Wands could easily be The Ship card in Lenormand. If it were, today's message would be about messages coming to us from afar or a message about foreign travel. 

But it's not a Lenormand card. It's the tarot card about "your ship coming in". So it's about some communication about your ship finally coming in. You've put in your hard work and now all that's left to do is wait while the reward—or consequences—come to you. The message is that the rewards are so close you can almost taste them. 

For me this speaks about a pitch I'm in on with one of my clients/partners. We're waiting for news about a proposal we put in. And we're all pretty excited about it. I've felt very confident from the get-go about this account. So I'll be surprised if we don't get it. 

But I have a philosophy about things I want that I don't get—that the reason I didn't get them was because some force was protecting me from some sort of disappointment. So while I'm excited about the prospect of this piece of business for many reasons, including reasons that have more to do with my partner than me, I rarely invest too heavily in outcomes when it comes to my emotions. If it doesn't happen, it's because I dodged a bullet. That's what I believe. So I have something to celebrate, win or lose. 

Anyway, we spoke earlier this week about planting seeds. And it seems like another seed is sprouting for us out there. We might think it's one thing, but it could actually be something we completely forgot about. And it could just be an element of personal growth. 

Something recently happened in my life to show me just how much I had grown in some areas. I was falsely accused of something. And, coming from the source it came from, it was very hurtful. In the past, I would have wrung my hands over it and obsessed over it. But instead, I got to the bottom of it (because it involved a situation I had no knowledge of), then once I got a handle on what I was being accused of, I pretty much let it go....surprising even me...haha. While this incident showed me how far I'd come, it also showed me places I have yet to go in regard to worrying about what others think. I'm not 100% there, but one thing I know that I haven't truly known before is that what matters most is who *I* think I am...who I KNOW I am based on my own self knowledge. That's a ship that took a loooong time to come in..haha. 

So think about your own life. What ship might be coming in now? And could it be some situation in which you've just grown as a person? Regardless, it's important to give ourselves a little "woo hoo!" when stuff like this happens. We don't often see all the hard work in retrospect, but it is truly a moment we made for ourselves from our own valuable effort. 

6/18/13—Being Holy on Earth

Today's Draw Classic*: Hanged Man from the Tarot of the Sidhe. Are you an earth-bound spirit? Or an earthling bound for spirit? If you have feet in both worlds, which foot will you lift first?

To me, the Hanged Man means one of three things—time spent in suspension/waiting, taking a look from a different angle, and a voluntary sacrifice. But within Emily Carding's illustration and lwb (little white book) she includes a few interesting nuances. 

First is that her Hanged Man is not tied upside down to a tree limb, as most Hanged Men are. He's "falling up" toward a holier reality. He gives himself up to the vortex pulling him in, but with his foot momentarily caught in a branch, exists in both worlds. As if at a vertical fork in the road, he must choose to remain suspended and unchanged, or release himself never to be the same again. He chooses to let go and be reborn. To be holy on earth.

Yesterday we spoke of a death...the death of the "I" that happens when we become a couple. In this card, we see a different aspect of ego death. It's more of a death of the I to become "one"...to become part of the universal "we" that exists between God and everyone. 

In the moment of the Hanged Man, though, he is in both places at once. He is holy and human. And as he releases his foot, he falls up into the Death card, the next card in the deck and card of his ultimate transformation. In the context of this discussion, he falls into the ultimate "oneness" of being, where we're not just walking in step with spirit, but with all things.

Personally, I believe we are all the Hanged Man. Holy and human. A spirit bound to the earth. A spirit on a human experience. But most see things the other way around...that we're humans on a spiritual experience. Or they don't think much about the distinction at all...haha. 

The difference between the two is critical and colors how you see yourself and your journey here on earth. Either you're a perfect, holy being who came here to experience the path of the human. Or you're a human who came here to experience the path of spirit. Either you came here to remember your true nature. Or you're here to forget your true nature. Knowing which you're here for is crucial to knowing why you're here and how to proceed while you're here. But regardless of which you believe, you still have feet in both worlds. You're still tasked with justifying or unifying both worlds. There's still some "I" to sacrifice to be "one". You're still in some way bound to a foreign world. It really just comes down to which one you think your soul calls home.

*From 9/21/11

6/17/13—Planting Seeds

Today's Draw: Ace of Wands from the Fairy Lights tarot in the Past position from the Deck of 1000 Spreads. Are you conscious of the seeds you plant on a daily basis? What seeds did you plant long ago that are only now bearing fruit? Do you see your life as a direct effect of the seeds you've planted in the past?

The Ace of Wands is about the seeds we plant that, with time, grow. While the Ace is meant to be an inspirational, positive card, the truth is, we plant all kinds of seeds in our lives. In the past week on my Facebook feed alone, I've seen friends' kids who have won sports tournaments...the seeds of their efforts over years finally bearing fruit. One guy met his siblings for the first time in his life at, I don't know, the age of 40 or so—a long and emotional gestation for all involved. And my personal favorite, a single gay male welcomed twin babies into his life in the past week. All of these are the result of some seed (literal or figurative) that was planted long ago.

In contrast, I also had a Facebook friend die of complications from diabetes—a disease he himself said he failed to take seriously in time. And I also "lost" another friend because he stumbled back into an addiction, the effects of which cause him to alienate anyone who ever cared for him. Both of those things involve seeds planted long ago that are now bearing fruit.

So the question is, what seeds are we planting in our lives? I ask this question in a different way quite often. What do we say and think that adds to what manifests in our lives, good and bad? What are we creating through our actions?

Last week I talked about my own issues with controlling my blood sugar. While diabetes comes largely from genetic roots, I can't help thinking my sweet tooth got me here sooner. All that sugar was a seed I planted for myself. I smoked for 26 years and while I've been quit for 10 years now, that doesn't mean I didn't plant the seeds of lung cancer, a disease my brother died from just last year. And I have a hard time throwing stuff out (not to mention my extensive collection of divinatory tools), which has planted a seed of clutter in my home...haha.

But I've also planted positive stuff. I'm a good doggie mom, which planted the seeds of three relatively well behaved dogs that I take to places like B&Bs on vacation. I write these blogs which plant all kinds of seeds, including, I hope, some good karma. I've built a very solid career and professional reputation which means I really don't have to work very hard to get work. In fact, when I look at my life, there are certainly some things I'd like to change, but overall, I'm pretty happy with the way I've propagated my fields. :)

Every day we plant seeds that bear fruit somewhere down the line. Maybe it's trivial stuff. Maybe it's good stuff. Maybe it's bad stuff. Many times we will plant those seeds completely unconsciously. We'll just do stuff without thinking of the import of it. We'll get aggressive in traffic, for example, which raises our blood pressure and stress level, makes us feel bad about ourselves and creates bad karma. In that case, the price is rarely worth that moment's fancy. But we will rarely think of it that way. And so we'll do it again. And again.

So with Monday being the beginning of a new week, see how consciously you can plant your seeds. And when you become conscious of the rows you sow, see if you don't change what you're planting so it bears some better fruit. We're not bound by the repetitive plantings of our past, nor are we limited by any soil or climate in what we're able to plant. Instead of leaking seeds out of our pants pockets unaware, let's see how intentionally we can grow a stronger, more fruitful life.

6/15/13-6/16/13—Enjoying Your Weekend

Weekend Reading: Time for Play, Reward and Make a Wish from Tierney's FABULOUS Oracle. Well, that's a pretty clear message, isn't it? You can't get a better weekend reading than that. Enjoy!

6/14/13—Reaching a Resolution

Today's Draw: Pay attention to Your Dreams, Look Inward and Transform and/or Adapt from Tierney's FABULOUS Homemade Oracle in the Resolution position from Tierney's FABULOUS Deck of 1000 Spreads. Have a situation that needs resolving? What have you tried so far? Are you waiting for someone or something other than yourself to resolve it?

I'm not sure if I could have come up with three more appropriate suggestions on my own for how to resolve issues than the three I chose from my oracle today. Each has its own nuance and/or hidden wisdom to share. So if there's a situation you're hoping to resolve, whether it requires a decision, an action or a new idea, try at least one of the following three. 

Pay Attention to Your Dreams. And not just your nighttime dreams, but your daydreams, too. Day or night, there's nothing silly about dreams, nothing to dismiss. If you write your dreams down, then substitute symbolic meanings for the symbols in your dreams, it often makes a very cohesive and revealing statement about what's going on in your subconscious. You can find dream dictionaries online, in books or even in apps. I went looking for my favorite, but it doesn't seem to be in print anymore. You'd be surprised at how a silly dream about being chased by gophers can reveal insights into your current issues. As for daydreams, they're not just things you wish would happen, but never do. They're doable. And they also often reveal the direction the soul is trying to point you into. So don't poo poo them anymore, They could be the resolution you're looking for. 

Look Inward. Personally I believe that we have all the answers we'll ever need inside us. So a few moments of silence and asking within can often provide a viable resolution. Sometimes the answer doesn't come right away, but spend the time anyway. Then just don't think about it for a while. You may find the answer pops into your head when it's the last thing on your mind. I know I get a LOT of good stuff when I'm in the shower. Or when I'm driving somewhere. Ideas will just come to me spontaneously. That little bit of taking me out of my normal thing sparks ideas. But there's also a deeper thing here. Our actions, whether it be a single action or a compilation of actions over the years, generally get us into the situation we're in. We may not want to see it that way, but it's how it is. So ask yourself why you brought yourself to this place/situation. What is this situation trying to tell you about yourself and what needs to change? Even if, say, you've got a mean husband and are trying to figure out how to leave him...what is it inside you that accepted that at one time and married this man in the first place. Often the way to resolve the problem is in fixing that part of you. The husband is only there to help you shine a light on it. 

Transform/Adapt. This is a really good one. Personally I can say I'm guilty of "either this situation changes or I'm out of here" thinking. Someone once approached me about an issue they were having in their relationship. They wanted to know whether they should leave. So I threw down some cards and the cards didn't say "leave" or "stay". Instead, they said "you will make a decision that leads to greater stability and happiness." So my advice to them was to make a decision. Either you leave and be done with it. Or you stay and change the way you see it. Either path is the road to greater happiness. What I'm getting at is that the answer is not always cut and dried. And there's not just one way to happiness. We often forget that, whether our partner changes or not, we can create change in the relationship simply by changing the way we respond to it or the way we see it. We get all caught up in wanting to be right and wanting the other person to change that we forget that the only variable we have control over is ourselves. So either we find a mindset that allows us to stay. Or we leave. Those are the only two paths to happiness you have control over. But keeping things the way they are will only keep things the way they are. 

I can't say for certain, but I think one of those three things, if not all three combined, can help you resolve any situation. They're certainly a lot better than avoidance and hiding. :) Of course they do require you to take responsibility for the situation and do something about it. But if you keep waiting for it to resolve itself, you could be waiting a long time. 

6/13/13—Getting Good News Today

Today's Draw: Bouquet in the House of Rider from Bridgett Trejo's Vibrant Visions Lenormand and the Deck of Lenormand Houses. How often do you get good news and surprises? What's the best one you can think of receiving recently? Think back really hard...how many of these have arrived already this week?

Aren't gifties fun? It seems like when we were kids we used to get lots of gifts and then when we become adults, the gift giving stops. Or transforms into the kinds of gifts you don't wrap, maybe. But I like the kind that jump out and surprise you, covered in ribbons. Or at least in packing materials. 

In a way, this Lenormand deck I'm featuring was a gift. It wasn't REALLY a gift, but it was a barter and came with the extra surprise of me getting one of the first ones. And it also came with the extra surprise of being so much more fun and colorful and lovely than it was in the pics I saw on Bridgett's site. There's just so much in the detail that doesn't come across in pics. 

There aren't two Riders in today's drawing. Just the House of the Rider, but I showed her Rider card because I liked it. The Rider is about news or something moving toward you. In this case, it's the gifts and surprises of the Bouquet card. But an extra little treat came from the writing in the background of the Rider cards which says "do more of what makes you happy", as though that's the directive the Rider brings. 

Anyhow, we say things like "giving is the true gift" or "I don't need any gifts when I have you". And all of that is true. But nothing beats a little surprise you either wished for or didn't see coming, especially if it turns out to be something you really like. I just read that one of my clients, who is a single gay man, got the news that the twins he's adopting were born this morning, six weeks early. That's definitely a Bouquet in the House of Rider moment. 

As I got to thinking about it in my own life, I just heard last night that me and one of my clients are on the short list for winning a nice account that we wanted. Also last night, I went to a School for Misfit Dogs class and when I walked Mystic around the parking lot, she was perfectly behaved, while the other dogs were distracted AND she walked behind me like good girls do. That's an incredibly positive development that really gives me hope that the days of Manic Mystic are numbered and the days of Mommy's Mystic have begun. 

In fact, the more I thought about good news and the arrival of gifts and surprises, the more of those things I saw in my life. Really. More than one per day, which is pretty cool. So it makes me think, how often does this happen that the moment passes by without savor or even acknowledgement as something special? And how different would our lives be if we DID savor it? I've always talked about how giving gratitude is the quickest way to get more of what you want in your life. What if you not only savored it, but were grateful for it? How might that change your life?