5/13/13—Cleaning Out Your Closets

Today's Draw: The Empress in the What's Crossing Success position from the Peaceful Path Tarot and the Deck of 1000 Spreads. Are you considering a big change? Is your life ok, but nothing terribly exiting? Could you use to shake up your routine a little?

The "Crossing" position in tarot is one that can help or hinder whatever it's modifying. And in the case of this card combo, I think it's saying that the continual birth of new ideas—and the continual rebirth of ourselves—symbolized by the Empress is what adds to our success in life.

I'm sure it's possible to be successful doing the same thing in the same way over and over again. In fact, I've noticed that a lot of authors in the spiritual non-fiction realm just regurgitate the same book over and over and they're successful. And it makes sense, in a way, because sometimes people just need to hear something a different way in order for it to sink in. So if you tell them the same thing over and over using different words, you're certain to reach them.

So you can find some forms of success regardless, but I think if you want success in marriage, personal development, career and all-around, you really have to try new things. In fact, I think it's a major contributor to happiness. And it's not just trying new things, it's having new ideas and thoughts—and being open to new ideas and thoughts.

I think the more we challenge ourselves to step outside our areas of complacency, the fresher and more vital life feels. When I look back on my life, I see where I've "reinvented" myself many times. In a way it's a rebirthing...you change your hair color, you switch careers, you change your lifestyle...all of those lead to a "new you". And think of vital you feel when you do something like that!

Beyond the dramatic things, what are some behavioral things where you're responding the same way over and over again? How can you change something there in a way that supports growth? Is there a way you see a certain issue where you could open your mind a little? Or some part of your daily routine you could reinvent? 

Also consider that if you have a big change you need to make, that the momentum can begin just by changing something small. So say you want to quit your job as an accountant to open a bakery and that feels like too big a leap to make, why not teach baking classes out of your home? Or try catering a friend's party? Or play with some recipes, substituting different flours? Or heck, why not just come up with a name for your bakery and print up some business cards? Or consider some sort of partnership pairing, like Sue's Bakery and Tacos...haha...just throw some ideas out there where someone could come in and share the risk. I've noticed that a lot of coffee shops get baked goods from neighborhood bakers...maybe start there. See? Instead of thinking "how am I going to afford this?" or "how am I going to create this change in my life?", just brainstorm all kinds of ideas. The act of thinking or doing or taking baby steps alone, could inspire something you never considered. 

I think if we all really took a look, we'd see there are some things we decided for ourselves 30 years and haven't challenged since then. They might be things we're happy with, but what if there's an option out there you'd be even happier with? You won't know that until you consider other options. 

In the same way we go through our closets every once in a while to throw out old fashions and things that no longer fit, the same opportunity exists in every area of our life. How long has it been since you've become conscious enough of your life to ask yourself "is XYZ really working for me anymore?...is the way I drive to work...the way I cook chicken...the way I engage others...the way I respond to stress...is all of that still working for me or is it possible there's a better way?" Often if we change the way we do something, things around it change, too. Are you ready to see what you can give birth to in your life today?

4/6/13-4/7/13—Letting Things Come in Their Own Time

Weekend Reading: The Empress from the Kitty Kahane Tarot in the What is Hidden position from the Deck of 1000 Spreads. With the Empress card in this position, surely someone is going to find out they're pregnant this weekend. But beyond that possibility, the Empress is also giving her little top-hatted duck man (that she usually keeps safe beneath her skirt) some space and time to develop on his own. So if the bun in your oven is something other than a human (or duck)—perhaps it's a project you're working on, your self development goals or something else you're anxious to see come into fruition—just give it its space this weekend and be ok with it coming about in its own time. The Empress is wise in three ways. She knows when to nurture. She knows when to let go. And she knows that everything comes about in its own time. 

11/30/12—Being the Quintessential Mother

Today's Draw: The Empress from the Wild Unknown Tarot. Do you see a lot of similarities between your parent's parenting and your own? What do you do well as a parent? What could you use a little work on?

As it turns out, I am my mother. I was sitting outside tonight, the dogs left inside against their desires, thinking about what a pain in the ass it can be to care for others and how much it sucks when that care comes at a cost to your own self care. 

I know my mom felt that way sometimes. Don't get me wrong, she was an amazing mother to six human children, held a full-time job and cared for my father. All of that came before anything she might do for herself. And sometimes she did things for us that just sucked the life out of her. But she did them anyway. 

Along with all of that, though, came a lot of drama. She'd cry out things about we were "getting on her last nerve" when we hadn't really done anything terribly wrong. She'd have the adult equivalent of tantrums. She'd even faint sometimes. Just for effect. And sometimes I would just stare at her wide-eyed, not understanding at all what could have driven her to these extremes of drama. 

But now I get it. And, mothers of human children out there, I don't know how you do it. Except that it's probably easier to communicate to a child about what is proper behavior.  Of course, my dogs don't talk back to me. So it's a trade-off. And I know I've got the much easier end of the stick. 

But this new dog has been sent to me as the ultimate challenge. It's rare that I can walk across a room without being accosted by a manic dog these days. I've tried every "positive" means of trying to teach her how not to flail and jump and nip. And none of them work. 

Yes, we're taking training classes. Are they helping? Yes. But only to a degree. See, Mystic gets scared at clickers and runs into a corner when she hears one. And the teacher keeps forgetting not to click in her face. There's only so much you can learn when you're hiding, traumatized in a broom closet and not in the classroom with the rest of the dogs. 

So yesterday after a long day of meetings followed by heavy traffic, I come home and put my carryout bag on the stove. Then I go upstairs to let Mystic out of her crate. And in the gap between how quickly a manic, freaked out dog gets down the stairs and how slowly an exhausted mommy does, Mystic manages to jump up on the stove and light my dinner—and almost the house—on fire. Yes, we are now getting child-proof knob covers. You live and you learn. 

What this is all leading to is that right now I feel like I'm on my "last nerve". And I think of how many times my mom was there. And even though she'd be on her last nerve, she'd still let me snuggle up to her and she'd stroke my hair and do her nurturing thing...just like I'm doing with Magick Moonbeam right now. Because that's what's mommies do. And, imperfections, complaints, drama and all, I'm glad to nurture in the same mold as my mother. 

The Empress is the quintessential mother and nurturer. But I think it's important to acknowledge that quintessential does not mean perfect. We do what we can do. And if we have a few emotional breakdowns along the way, so be it. The most important thing is that, at the end of the day, we love our babies and try to do our best for them. 



For my tarot friends who may be considering this deck. It's beautiful. LOVE the card stock. It's very smooth and silky and substantial. And the artwork is very nice. As an FYI, many pips are non- or just partially illustrated. But if you're on the fence and wondering about quality, I say get it. http://www.thewildunknown.com/

9/20/12—Returning to the Mother

Today's Draw: The Empress from the Sacred Sites Tarot. Are you a mother? How is your relationship with your mother? How do relate to the myth of Demeter?

Each card in this deck is attributed to a sacred site. This card is about the Sanctuary of Demetra, dedicated to the Eleusinian mysteries. So today I learned that the Eleusinian mysteries were ceremonies held for the cult of Persephone and Demeter. 

So if you're not up on the scoop, Persephone was out gathering flowers one day when Hades popped out of the underworld and kidnapped her. Her distraught mother, Demeter, the goddess of agriculture and fertility, searched for her. Her distress caused a draught that left people starving and dying. Because of this Zeus interceded, because gods need people to worship them and when the people die, so does the worship. So he made a deal with Hades to let Persephone return to her mother part of the year. 

So when Persephone is with Demeter, the earth comes alive with the warmth of the sun and crops are abundant. And she returns to Hades, the earth grows cold and raw. And that, folks, is why we have seasons!

This is a perfect card for relationship week. But since this is about the mother/child relationship, I'm limited in my ability to address it. I don't know what it's like to have a human child. I only know what it's like to be one. 

A while back I watched a show about Jaycee Dugard. She's the woman that was kidnapped at 11 and remained in captivity for 18 years. Her mother never really gave up hope. There seems to be something in the programming between mother and child that tells one if the other is still alive. You hear these moms say it all the time...that they felt their child was gone when they were. Or that they felt their child was alive when they were. There's something remarkable about the connection between two bodies that once lived as one. 

Likewise, Jaycee had two daughters of her own while in captivity. And the circumstances of their birth did not change the depth of that connection. In fact, surviving that tragedy may have even made the connection that much more precious. Her mother also adores her grandchildren. The legacy of unconditional love cannot be broken any more than the energetic bond between mother and child. 

So you can see how Demeter's sorrow was powerful enough to cause a smothering drought. I imagine that's what Jaycee's mom felt inside all those years. 

I can only speak of this relationship from the other side. I'm a doggy mom and my commitment to them is all-in and unconditional, but right or wrong or whatever, we do hold human life more precious. It's a key difference in the relationships. But I do know this, I lost my mom at 21 and have not stopped missing her since. 

So today, honor that connection in whatever way you can. If you and your mom aren't the best of friends, give her a call anyway. I'm certain that, no matter what you think, her heart aches to know you've been thinking of her. If the two of you are close, call just to hear her voice and tell her so. If you are so incredibly lucky to have your mother still among the living, please take advantage of that. And if you don't, look inside your heart...that one that once beat within her womb and the one that was forever shaped by her love. She will always be there waiting for the day you reunite and life is abundant once again. 

3/6/12—Letting Your Energy Flow

Today's Draw: The Four of Pentacles from the Steampunk Tarot by Barbara Moore and Aly Fell. What energy have you inadvertently cut the flow of in your life? What parts of yourself do you cling too tightly to, lest anyone ever see them? And how awesome am I that I already have a deck that's not even slated to be released until May?!?!

One of the world's tarot's goddesses is a woman named Barbara Moore. A quick glance at Amazon lists more than a dozen titles—from books to decks—bearing her name. Beyond that, she's the tarot acquisitions editor for Llewellyn, so whatever she doesn't create herself, she's instrumental in bringing to the world. And then there's at least one deck I know of she authored under a pen name. If you're a tarot reader and don't know who she is, check your bookshelves. 

So how AWESOME must I be to have, in my greedy little hands, her most recent and hotly anticipated deck and book—The Steampunk Tarot?!! This one is all Barbara. She directed the art and wrote book. If I'm not the only person outside her who has the complete kit, I'm one of the very few. I'm not even a reviewer! And she signed my book, too! Gah! No, wait....double gah!

Four of Swords, with a macabre twist.

*catching my breath, letting heartbeat return to normal* 

I would be remiss with all this fawning over the great Ms. Moore if I didn't mention that Babs is also a friend of mine and this was a very sweet and generous offering for my birthday week (the big day is Saturday). For a tarot person, it's like being friends with Oprah. :D

Anyway....

The Four of Pentacles is a card about holding on too tight to resources. The card shows a mechanical contraption that grabs and locks away every coin. A penny saved is a penny earned. Or is it? In the book, Barbara points out that too strict a diet with your resources stops the flow of energy. If that buck stops here and stays here, then how does the flow continue in the universe? Holding on too tightly can cause stagnation. And stagnation leads to rot.

We all want to feel safe and secure. Nobody's suggesting you don't save money. But holding on too tightly does two things: it sets up an energy of not having enough. If you focus on lack, the universe gives more of a feeling of lack. And it also cuts the flow of energy from moving through you to others, then back around to you again. You may accumulate more money. But what is your spirit losing in the process when you're counting every cent?

We've talked about poverty mentality just recently, so I'll move away from the whole money aspect and broaden the conversation to love, creativity, friendship and even God. Anything you hold on to too tightly, cuts off a flow and causes stagnation. We all know when we hold on too tightly to another person, they slip away. We've seen this.

The High Priestess

But the same is true about our ideas and ideals. Locking things inside of the curio cabinets within doesn't make them safer or stronger. They're more vulnerable because there's so much import placed around them...and so much energy of worry and fear of loss. While their hold over you strengthens, they weaken you if they never have the chance to come out and play and be tested in the real world. Even our beliefs need to come out for fresh air now and again to see if they're still viable. 

The parts of ourselves that we lock away from others—whether out of greed, spite or shame—are lost potential. They're areas ripe for growth and healing. And they don't just help us grow and heal when we trot them out, they help others, too. Plus they have the added benefit of facilitating intimacy and depth in relationships. 

Six of Swords

What happens when we routinely lock these things inside is that we become an automaton, like the clever bank in the card. Our monsters thrive in the dark, growing larger in our perception and increase their control over our lives, limiting our full expression. We like to stare and point at the Hoarders we see on the TV show. But it's no less soul sucking when we hoard the valuables within. It's just less visible. Those that appear most perfect are often the ones with the most toxic issues—and genuine gifts—locked within.

I think I've shared this analogy before, but I'll share it again. Picture everything outside you and everything within as a wet bar of soap in the shower. What happens when you hold on too tightly? What happens when you don't hold on tight enough? In both cases, the soap will slip from your hands. The key is to find that range of strength where your grasp is firm, yet fluid enough to keep the soap moving and doing its job.